Last night, I found out that someone I thought highly of thinks I am trying to thwart their involvement in the community. That was really surprising – and not in a good way. They sent an open letter to me on a egroup basically claiming I’m a liar – claiming that I did a lot of bad things to them.

It was one of those things where reality seems to come to a screeching halt as you experience it. Since this was someone who I thought highly of, I had to stop, get my ego out of the way and really think about what this person said. I just can’t reconcile this person’s version of reality with my memory of specific circumstances, motives or feelings. The worst part was finding out that this person – a person I liked – thinks I am fearful of their community involvement and I have a personal grudge against them.

On an emotional level, it was kind of like having someone I thought well of sneak up and clobber me with a 2×4. I had no clue that this person thought these things about me.

By nature, I’m one of those people who, if 99 out of 100 people stand up in a room and tell me that I’m a good person and the one person left says that I’m not, I will obsess on that one person. I’ve worked hard on letting that character trait go since it only leads to my suffering. So, I’m trying to let this person and their issues go and understand that they have a right to think and feel whatever they want.

I woke up this morning with a killer headache. While I took something for it, my head just kept pounding.

I went back to bed and slept until lunchtime. When I got up, it still felt as though I had little hammers banging away at my skull, so I went back to bed and slept until almost 5.

My headache is gone now and now and I think I’m gonna make some tea and soak in the tub for a while.